What is beauty? More importantly how could you ever define a living breathing human being as “ugly”? Let me first just say that there is so much beauty in all of us. The way our chests rise and fall when we breathe and the way we love, and how we fall in love is beautiful. There’s beauty in our youth and how fleetingly short our lives are, there’s beauty in small acts of kindness and watching the rain fall and counting how many freckles are on someone’s arm. Beauty is how you feel and so never give anyone the power to take that away from you.
Today in science class when we’d just decided that natural selection doesn’t exist in humans some boy had something to say. Something that he must have thought was funny and it went something like this, “Natural selection exists in humans such as ugly people, because like ugly people can’t reproduce because no one wants to be with them.”
At the time I just thought he was being an idiot but now after I’ve thought about it, I am so incredibly pissed that someone would even have the nerve to say that. How could you be so heartless? Really this post is just a rant but I want to make it so incredibly crystal clear that no one is ugly! I mean I’m an insecure teenage girl with insane body image issues and yeah I definitely put myself down a lot especially when looking in the mirror about how much I need to change so that someone might one day think I’m pretty. Yeah I know that isn’t great but whenever I feel like this it’s so awful I wish that no one else would ever know what it’s like to feel this way.
Boys who think like this must never have felt so incredibly numb to the world that it hurts, so numb that all that’s left is pain. They’ve never wished on a star for love, never said no to a social event so that you wouldn’t feel anxiety about all the food that would be around. These boys and girls who think like this, they don’t know what it’s like to be up at 2am just wanting someone to talk to about how insecure you feel but instead you just end up in your bed with fairy lights and your favourite music crying until your eyes are puffy and red, just wishing there was someone who understood. So I definitely find this so hurtful.
Even more insulting though is that what this boy was pretty much insinuating was that there is a mould for how people should look and that if you don’t fit that mould you’re ugly and no one will ever love you. I spend enough time trying to convince myself that I’m fine the way I am, I’m not exactly happy with the way I look and that’s a completely different problem altogether but I mean I think at one time or another every girl has that issue with themselves. When you’re a teenage girl trying to get over body image issues a lot of what you seem to think about is, “Will anyone ever love me?” One of the only ways to get over this issue is to accept yourself and your body and decide that getting a boy or a girl to love you for how you look isn’t the most important thing, in fact it’s not even important at all. What’s important is finding someone who loves you because you’re beautiful inside, because you’re a good person. Someone who loves you to the moon and back because they love what’s inside, and it’s important to find someone with whom you feel the same about. Be true to who you are and don’t lose sight of yourself for the boy who values outside beauty, because he will never be worth it.
All I’m saying is that love who you are inside first, and after that love yourself on the outside too, before you try to find someone who will love you the way you love yourself. But maybe I’m wrong, maybe we need someone to love us so that we can realize we should love ourselves as well, that’s it’s okay to love who we are. Truly though I don’t think there are many teenage boys who understand that or who can be that person because for a lot of them its all tits, ass, sex. If you have found a good one though because I know they are out there, I hope he understands just how much beauty lives inside you. Love yourself because you are truly the most beautiful person I have never met.
Much Love Darlings,